Strawberry Fields Forever...& Waffles

He was working through college
On my grandpa's farm
I was thirsting for knowledge
And he had a car
Yeah, I was caught somewhere between a woman and a child
One restless summer we found love growing wild
On the banks of the river on a well-beaten path
It's funny how those memories they last

Like strawberry wine and seventeen
The hot July moon saw everything
My first taste of love, oh bittersweet
The green on the vine
Like strawberry wine

Strawberry Wine - Deanna Carter

You're never going to believe this, but I'm blogging about strawberries! Seriously, though, I'm actually blogging about waffles, the homemade kind...with strawberries on the side. And syrup. And whipped cream. That's not out of a spray can. Hater's gonna hate. I do not like spray whipped cream. Didn't Demi Moore overdoes on that stuff? Is that even a real thing? I'm overly naive about some things. Wink, wink.

But before we start, listen to my disclaimer. In anticipation of Harper Lee's Go Set A Watchman, I just re-read my favorite book of all time (Ms. Lee's other one, you know), TWICE. In To Kill A Mockingbird, one of the pivotal lines says something like, "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it." I live in a teeny tiny house. It chose me. It was the first bungalow built in my little town in 1910. I have a kitchen that's a cross between Gray Gardens and going camping. If you understand that, we are best friends.Things my kitchen has: the world's tiniest oven, dubbed "The McOven", a gorgeous 1910 freestanding porcelain sink in desperate need of a good refinishing, and a decent amount of room. Things my kitchen does not have: cabinets. Also, pretty countertops & most other kitchen stuff. So, walk around in my skin for a minute and don't think nasty thoughts about my little kitchen. Or do. I love my kitchen and it loves me. Enough said. Let's be like the donkey in Shrek and start MAKING WAFFLES!

Do you see the gorgeous whipped cream and the beautiful strawberries with my farmhouse sink photobombing the picture? Please read the entire recipe before you attempt to make these waffles. I cook like I talk: scary, scary thoughts, but the results are delish.

Best Waffles Ever

Step 1 - Batter

1 3/4 C all-purpose flour

1 Tbsp baking powder

1/2 C Brown Sugar

4 Tbsp cinnamon

1/4 tsp salt

2 egg yolks

1 3/4 C milk (I don't drink cow's milk, but there's generally some skim in my fridge. I tried almond but did not like the results.)

1/2 C cooking oil

2 egg whites

So, I never really measure anything. Just eyeball it, especially the brown sugar and cinnamon. I've been known to add nutmeg, too. Mix all the dry stuff in one LARGE mixing bowl and all the wet (sans egg whites) in another one. Add the wet to the dry and mix by hand until most but not all of the lumps are gone. Now it get's fun. Use a mixer (hand or stand) to whip just the 2 egg whites until you can pick up the beaters and the egg whites stand at attention. I believe this is referred to as stiff peaks. Dump the egg whites into the other batter and fold, fold, fold, fold. Not too much. Just until they are incorporated into your batter. It will look something like this...

While you will need a waffle iron, it doesn't need to be a fancy waffle iron. Mine is not pictured because I would be mortified if you saw it. One hinge is broken and it used to be white. It cooks delicious waffles, though.Usually I net about 10 nice waffles. You are now finished with the most difficult portion of your meal. Have a mimosa on me!

Step 2 - Strawberry Topping

People literally do back flips for my strawberry topping. Ok, maybe I exaggerate for effect. I use this BOTH for waffles and for strawberry shortcake. It's so simple and so very good.

You will need an entire produce aisle container of strawberries, a large plastic container with a lid that seals like a Kylie Jenner lip challenge, and some sugar. Cut off the tops of the strawberries and slice them...thinly...as thinly as you can without incorporating your own thumb skin. It will take a while. This should be step 1, perhaps. But, Dina, this takes toooooo long! Just turn on Pandora and set it to the Linda Ronstadt station and see yourself in cutoff jeans and hoop earrings. Linda is my spirit animal. Sometimes Rita Coolidge is....just slice the strawberries very thinly. 

Add approximately 2/3 C of sugar and plop them all in the airtight container that nothing can escape from. Put the lid on tightly. Shake them until the sugar dissolves. Shake them until they start to fall apart. Shake them until (you get the picture). Then set them aside and do step 2 which was really step 1 above. As they sit for about 15 minutes, they will continue liquefying and you'll end up with amazing strawberries in their own syrup, thanks to the sugar. I never said this would be healthy. Did I mention my kitchen island was really an old restaurant cart with a plywood top? My affectionate term is hillbilly butcher-block. 

Step 3 - Turkey Bacon (Should probably be Step 2 but I was so excited to talk about the waffles)

If you so desire, I have a GREAT tip for you regarding turkey bacon. Cover a cookie sheet with foil and spray with non-stick spray. Preheat your oven to about 375 (the McOven cooks WAY TOO FAST - you may need 400). No need to flip midway, just pop the turkey bacon in the oven and give it a good 10 min or so. You'll never microwave it again.

Step 4 - Use either the hand or stand mixer and approximately 1/2 of a small carton of heavy whipping cream. Add about 2 TBSP of sugar. Beat it until you can scoop up a spoonful that won't fall from the spoon when held upside down, like a Dairy Queen Blizzard. Try not to eat the whole bowl full of whipped cream, but do check it for poison, duh.

That's it!!!!! Melt some real butter (please do not use fake butter), and call in the troops. The options are endless. I always have syrup on hand (heated), along with the strawberries and whipped cream. Our favorite combo is what we call a mess: one waffle with melted butter, a light coating of syrup, a spoonful of strawberry Heaven, and some whipped cream. So, re-read this, put the steps in the correct order, and give it a try. Y'all come on & eat!

Can I just say that this was THE MOST DIFFICULT thing I've ever written?

Thank you for making it to the end! I thought I'd never get the pictures in the correct places. It's 11 pm and 2 glasses of wine Dina wishes you an amazing waffle breakfast with all those you love dearly.